17 Funny People Who Have This Thing Called Life All Figured Out

Humans. We’re all floating around on a speck of dust in the vastness of space but what holds us together is love, faith, and hope. Life is a glorious thing but it often presents challenges to overcome. In my opinion, that is what makes life so exciting.

As we grow older, some of us have problems with the whole adulting thing. The following 17 people have life all figured out and their views are totally genius AND hilarious!

1) Here are 17 funny people who have life all figured out…

“I take toilet paper from public restrooms so I don’t have to buy any.”

2)

“I pretended to be sick at work so I could go home. Really, my phone was just dying and I didn’t want to be stuck at work with no phone.”

3)

“When no one is looking, I like to fill the tub up with tomato juice and swim around like a little meat ball.”

4)

“I didn’t sleep well last night so I made my coffee this morning with Red Bull instead of water. I got half way to work before I realized I forgot my car.”

5)

“At night, before I go to bed, I have to have my roommate hide my alarm clock in my room so I have to get out of bed to find it in the morning when it goes off.”

6)

“Once I was talking to a girl on webcam and her dad walked in…I pretended to be an advertisement.”

7)

“I once took a guy to Starbucks because I forgot his name.” While you’re there, why not get a Starbucks secret menu Frappuccino?

8)

“I’m too lazy to make a grilled cheese so I just flip my toaster on its side.”

9)

“I told my teenaged daughters that global warming is a hoax so I didn’t have to explain it.”

10)

“I’m so lazy that I heat my food up on a space heater.”

11)

“I once cried because I didn’t have any more gum.”

12)

“I tell people I broke my foot playing soccer. I was actually twerking.”

13)

“Sometimes I blow my nose in the dirty clothes on the floor rather than getting out of bed for Kleenex.”

14)

“I once sneezed out a Sour Patch Kid, and I had no idea where it came from.”

15)

“I haven’t left my house in three days and I probably won’t tomorrow either.”

16)

“Sometimes I sit on the toilet so long while looking at my phone, my legs start to go numb.”

17)

“I took myself out on a date. I should do this more often.”

H/t: Whisper.sh

I think some of these would also be suitable as life hacks! Please share these people who have life all figured out with your friends and family.